| 623 face, with sound arguments, it might be an honor; but to mangle the flesh, or seek revenge upon one who never did you any wrong, cannot be a source of sweet reflection to you nor to me, neither to an honorable father and mother, brothers and sisters. And when we reflect with what care and with what unremitting diligence our parents have striven to watch over us, and how many hours of sorrow and anxiety they have spent over our cradles and bedsides, in times of sickness, how careful we ought to be of their feelings in their old age. It cannot be a source of sweet reflection to us to say or do anything that will bring their gray hairs down with sorrow to the grave.
"'In your letter you ask my forgiveness, which I readily grant. But it seems to me, that you still retain an idea that I have given you reasons to be angry or disaffected with me. Grant me the privilege of saying then; that however hasty and harsh I may have spoken at any time to you, it has been done for the express purpose of endeavoring to warn, exhort, admonish, and rescue you from falling into difficulties and sorrows, which I foresaw you plunging into, by giving way to that wicked spirit, which you call your passions, which you should curb and break down, and put under your feet; which if you do not, you never can be saved, in my view, in the Kingdom of God. God requires the will of his creatures to be swallowed up in his will.
"'You desire to remain in the church, but forsake your apostleship. This is the stratagem of the evil one; when he has gained one advantage, he lays a plan for another. But by maintaining your apostleship, in rising up and making one tremendous effort, you may overcome your passions, and please God. And by forsaking your apostleship, is not to be willing to make that sacrifice that God requires at your hands, and is to incur his displeasure; and without pleasing God we do not think it will be any better for you. When a man falls one step, he must regain that step again, or fall another; he has still more to gain, or eventually all is lost.
"'I desire, Brother William, that you will humble yourself. I freely forgive you, and you know my unshaken and unchangeable disposition; I know in whom I trust; I stand
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